When I saw the movie Waiting, I felt 2 things: 1) Appalled at the nasty kitchen stuff they showed because our kitchen did none of that but forever after I had to reassure terrified customers that no, they wouldn't get their food spit on if they wanted their burger cooked a little longer and 2) Highly amused by the character cliches, because they were spot on.
We had our cranky, don't-take-no-shit waitresses who had been there way too long, we had the young and innocent new hostesses who hadn't been made cynical by years of restaurant work, we had the cooks who liked to joke and play games. (Seriously, though, guys. It was an open kitchen. Nothing happened back there. The worst thing they did was throw cheese on the wall and yeah, a customer complained about that even though it was nowhere near their food.) We did not have a savvy, charming know-it-all server like Ryan Reynolds BUT we did have my favorite character, the eccentric semi-wise-semi-insane cook who dispensed his wisdom.
Cam was a grizzled man in his 50s, with Samuel Jackson-esque eyes, wide and slightly crazy. He was entertaining, but I didn't pay much attention to him until the night he decided I was in need of his sage advice. With his restaurant hat on backwards and apron tied around his hips, he ushered me into a booth and asked me how my relationship was doing. What followed was 45 minutes of an intense, face-to-face lecture, most of which I can no longer recall. But the bits that stuck with me are these:
We had our cranky, don't-take-no-shit waitresses who had been there way too long, we had the young and innocent new hostesses who hadn't been made cynical by years of restaurant work, we had the cooks who liked to joke and play games. (Seriously, though, guys. It was an open kitchen. Nothing happened back there. The worst thing they did was throw cheese on the wall and yeah, a customer complained about that even though it was nowhere near their food.) We did not have a savvy, charming know-it-all server like Ryan Reynolds BUT we did have my favorite character, the eccentric semi-wise-semi-insane cook who dispensed his wisdom.
Cam was a grizzled man in his 50s, with Samuel Jackson-esque eyes, wide and slightly crazy. He was entertaining, but I didn't pay much attention to him until the night he decided I was in need of his sage advice. With his restaurant hat on backwards and apron tied around his hips, he ushered me into a booth and asked me how my relationship was doing. What followed was 45 minutes of an intense, face-to-face lecture, most of which I can no longer recall. But the bits that stuck with me are these:
- People tend to choose a partner based on the holes in their own personality
- You shouldn't be with someone who completes you. You should be with someone who complements you. They can make you better, but you can't rely upon them.
And honestly, I have no idea if he came up with this stuff on his own, but as an impressionable 19 year old in a shit relationship, it was some powerful stuff.
But that's not all! I have also been on the receiving end of wisdom from the crazy, possibly homeless man at the bus stop! After he (black) reassured me that it was ok, he was actually white because he was born in Australia and all their birth certificates say white, so go ahead and admit that white is better, I started to pointedly ignore him and refuse to make eye contact. So, deciding that race wasn't a good topic, he decided to move on to relationships.
Still avoiding eye contact and staring down at my book pretending to read, I couldn't help overhearing this gem:
- Your partner can't come first. This is the order that it needs to go in: 1) God 2) Yourself 3) Your hand. Because your hand was around before your partner ever was and your hand will be there when your partner is gone and 4) Then your partner. They only come after everything else.
So cutting out the religious and masturbation parts of that lesson, yeah I suppose I can agree that you should put yourself first. And it really was something I needed to hear at that time. Of course, crazy homeless man really had nothing on Cam, whose potential insanity just added to his charm. I believe Cam was later fired for stealing steaks, but I've always appreciated that conversation.
Have you ever had wisdom come from an unexpected source?
